You Can Disagree Without Looking Down on Someone

Some words hit closer to home

Recently, Mercy Leaf shared a post about comments attributed to Spotsylvania County Supervisor David Goosman, describing cannabis users as lazy, smelly and people others shouldn’t have to put up with.

I want to explain why those words bothered me so much.

I’m a veteran. I’ve lived with PTSD and I know what it’s like to carry things that other people can’t see. I know what it’s like to look perfectly fine on the outside while fighting battles that nobody around you understands.

And I know how easy it is for someone who doesn’t understand your circumstances to make assumptions about who you are.

That’s part of why Mercy Leaf exists.

Cannabis isn’t the answer to everything. It’s not right for everyone and I would never pretend otherwise. But I’ve met people who are simply trying to find some relief. Veterans trying to get through another night. People living with chronic pain. Cancer patients struggling with symptoms that most of us wouldn’t wish on anybody.

They’re not asking to be celebrated for using cannabis. They’re asking to be treated like human beings.

And when someone in a position of public trust reduces those people to stereotypes, I believe we have a responsibility to speak up.

Words carry weight, especially when they come from leaders

I don’t expect every elected official to support cannabis. I don’t even expect everyone to agree with Mercy Leaf’s approach.

Disagreement is part of living in a community. But there’s a difference between opposing cannabis use and looking down on the people who use it.

You can question the laws. You can question the research. You can have concerns about public health, regulation and community impact. Those are conversations worth having.

But calling people lazy or suggesting they’re somehow unpleasant or unworthy of consideration doesn’t contribute to those conversations. It shuts them down before they ever begin.

And when those words come from someone elected to represent the community, they deserve to be challenged.

Because whether you agree with their choices or not, cannabis users are your constituents, too.

I have to check my own heart

Here’s where this becomes a reflection rather than just another opinion piece.

When I hear comments like those, my first reaction isn’t always particularly Christlike. Sometimes I get angry.

I think about the veterans I’ve known who struggle just to make it through an ordinary day. I think about people facing serious illnesses who are already exhausted from having to explain themselves. And I wonder how anyone could look at those situations and decide that judgment is the appropriate response.

But then I have to ask myself a difficult question: Am I extending the same grace I’m asking others to show?

Because it’s easy to preach compassion when we’re talking about people we understand. It’s a lot harder when we’re talking about someone whose words have hurt people we care about.

James 2:13 reminds us that mercy triumphs over judgment.

That doesn’t mean words don’t have consequences. It doesn’t mean we shouldn’t challenge harmful statements or expect accountability from public officials.

It means we shouldn’t become so consumed with proving someone wrong that we forget they are a person, too. And yes, that includes Mr. Goosman.

Mr. Goosman, I’m genuinely asking

Do you still believe what those earlier comments appeared to communicate about cannabis users?

If you do, I’d like to understand why. And if you don’t, I’d genuinely welcome hearing how your perspective has changed.

I’m not asking for a perfectly worded political statement. I’m asking whether you’ve had an opportunity to reconsider how you view the people those remarks described.

Because I would welcome the chance for you to sit down with a veteran who uses cannabis to manage difficult symptoms. Or a caregiver helping someone through cancer. Or a neighbor whose experience simply doesn’t fit the stereotype.

Not to embarrass you. Not to win some argument on Facebook. But because sometimes our opinions change when the people we’ve been talking about become the people we’re talking with.

And if your views have changed, I believe that deserves recognition.

There’s no shame in learning something new. There’s no weakness in admitting that our words may have been unfair. The real disappointment would be refusing to reconsider them at all.

Mercy isn’t the absence of accountability

Something I’ve learned through my own life is that grace and accountability aren’t enemies. In fact, I think genuine grace sometimes requires difficult conversations.

Jesus didn’t avoid uncomfortable truths to keep everyone happy. He challenged people, particularly when their attitudes or actions placed burdens on others. But He also recognized that people could grow beyond their past mistakes.

That’s the example I want Mercy Leaf to follow.

I don’t want us to be afraid of challenging stereotypes, even when they come from elected officials. But I also don’t want us to become an organization that measures success by how thoroughly we can tear someone down.

There’s already enough of that in the world.

I’d rather see a difficult conversation turn into understanding. I’d rather see a public official reconsider an old opinion than watch hundreds of people argue about it without anything changing.

And I’d rather be part of building a community where people feel heard, even when they disagree.

Final thoughts

I’m not going to apologize for defending veterans, patients and everyday people who deserve dignity.

And I’m not going to pretend that dismissive words are harmless simply because they may have been spoken years ago. Time alone doesn’t answer whether someone’s views have changed.

But I am willing to listen.

Mr. Goosman, if your perspective has evolved, I’d welcome that conversation. If it hasn’t, I’d still welcome the opportunity to explain why those words deserve another look.

Because at the end of the day, Mercy Leaf isn’t about winning a political fight. It’s about helping people.

And sometimes helping people means speaking up when they’re being judged unfairly. Other times, it means extending grace to the person doing the judging.

We can hold someone accountable without deciding they’re incapable of change.

That’s the kind of compassion I believe Jesus calls us to practice. Not just when it’s convenient. Especially when it isn’t.